The Meek

Casual research on the subject reveals a narrative pattern of benevolent grandparents dipping into their savings to help a recently married grandson or parents liquidating assets they themselves inherited in the 90’s, to partially fund starter homes for their children. Naturally, these tales are not without humour. A retired couple are in the process of donating a lavish apartment to their reclusive son. It is their final attempt at making this still-single, monosyllablic, thirty-five-year old prodigy an attractive proposition to the opposite sex. This works both ways. A friend of mine, Krystian, told me of a colleague who spent his twenties carousing, sampling the many fruits Silesian femininity has to offer. When he eventually decided to settle down, it was with a woman in possession of a 50 square metre apartment in the city. Such tales bring to mind the question allegedly put to Slovenian Melanija Knavs: “What was it that first attracted you to the billionaire property developer Donald Trump?” For many, inheritance is the only means of entering the middle-class. Young Silesians it seems are litte more than characters in a Victorian novel, where scheming rakes prey on wealthy ingenues and the wills of deceased dowagers are contested by squabbling families. In such a novel, the meek few who fall outside the golden circle of gifted property, are forced to press their soot-stained noses against the window and dream of inheriting the earth.

Acquiring a property in Silesia on the basis of a salary alone is possible for the very few. In many of our cities, it is impossible to break into the property market unless of course you want to buy in Bytom and plan to live several metres below the ground with the trolls and members of Ordu Iuris. In Gliwice, where house prices have risen by a third over the past half-decade, the idea of a PRACTICAL SILESIAN doctor and a handsome, charismatic Irish columnist being able to buy a semi-detached home seem remote.

In unrelated news. My mother, sole proprietor of a stunning, detached house located five minutes from a golden, west of Ireland beach, returned from her hospital check-up to be told her blood-work was “phenomenal” and she has “the heart of a twenty-year old.”

Great news. So great. Yay.